From An Uncertified Self-Proclaimed Diet Junky.
What Are You Afraid Of?
The sad truth is, that in order to begin to lose weight you need to first discover what you are afraid of. There are so many ways that people are afraid and much of their fear, sadness, depression, and anger is manifested in their weight, because they eat their emotions. While you may be able to identify what it is, or why it is that you have put on weight, you also need to find out why you haven’t committed to taking taking it off and being a healthier version of yourself. When you begin to eat those things that are keeping you from being the best version of yourself, what are you feeling, thinking, seeing?
For me, it was fear and self fulfilling prophecies. I always worried that I wasn’t enough. Not pretty enough, not skinny enough, and shit, not white enough. At my heaviest weight of 230 lbs, I ate my fear and depression. I was afraid that if I went out and tried to enjoy life, people would see me for the imposter I really was. That I was depressed, miserable, and so sad that I wanted to die. How could I go out and fake it? Surely they would know. And let’s not forget the fear of being mocked, laughed at, and stigmatized. At 230 pounds it was terrifying to even think about going into a gym or fitness class.
I imagined waddling up to the door, in my workout leggings that showed every roll, dimple, and pudgy spot I had. That as I opened the door and walked past the smoothie bar that the gorgeous fit guy behind the counter would stair disgustingly with a sneer on his lip and a slight chuckle under his breath. The kind of chuckle that is just loud enough for you to hear, because he wants you to know you are repulsive. Then once in the gym walking past the line of toned and tight people on their treadmills, I imagined their eyes following me and watching all the things jiggle and shake while I walked past.
Only to get on the treadmill and barely able to walk a 2.5 mile pace all the while huffing and puffing as if I were going to die. That was part of what I imagined. That was a small piece of the fear that held me back.
So, what are you imagining or afraid of that is holding you back?
What and Who Are You Losing It For?
As a self-proclaimed dieting expert, I can tell you that no weight loss will stick around if you are doing it for temporary reasons. Let’s see, how many of these things can you check off your, “why I am losing weight” list?
- I need to be in shape for summer
- I want to buy new clothes/dress
- I need to look amazing for my wedding
- So-and-so wants their partner to be fit
- I will be so much more happy when I lose weight
- I can’t go out because people will stare and laugh at how fat I am
Were you able to check any of those off the list? Were there a few that I forgot? One thing I can tell you without a doubt, is every time myself or a friend had reasons like these about why we wanted to lose weight one of two things occurred. One, losing weight never happened, or two the weight loss was not long term. So, before you begin your weight loss journey, be proud that you realize there is room for improvement, but more importantly, consider what improvement you really want to achieve. Are you losing because your health depends on it? Are you losing because your fertility and future family depend on it? Are you losing because you want to gain more self-confidence and be comfortable in hour own skin? Why is this process and goal sooooo important to you?
If you find that it is for superficial reasons (I am not saying they are entirely bad), be sure to dig a little deeper and find a reason that has more meaning to you. Maybe it is to create a family, or maybe to avoid the heart attack that your family member suffered. Be sure there is a substantial ‘why’ to keep you focused when you want to go back to bad patterns.
S.M.A.R.T. Goals Are Key, but So Is Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone.
When it comes to goals there are five key factors to setting them.
- Specific. Be sure that you are specific in what you want to achieve. I will lose 20 pounds of fat is waaaaaaay different than, I want to lose weight . Then you need to dig deeper and complete how you will do it, who will help you, where, etc?
- Measurable. Just some generalization of wanting to lose 20 pounds in 2019 is totally different than saying you want to lose 20 pounds within 4 months of 2019.
- Achievable. This is the a BIG one! Make sure that what you are asking for is actually achievable. Asking for a 50 pound weight loss in 4 months is not easily achievable if you take the safe and healthy steps to do it.
- Relevant. How is this relevant to you at this exact moment? Is this going to help you be the person YOU want to be or is this relevant for someone or something else?
- Time bound. Giving yourself a time frame gives a sense of urgency because the deadline in looming. Otherwise we would forever, be stuck in our the same place focusing on the same goals.
Want to learn more? Read this article to help you begin planning. https://www.yourcoach.be/en/coaching-tools/smart-goal-setting.php
Get Your B-HAG On!
If you have never heard of this term, now is the time to get associated with it. B-HAG is a big, hairy, audacious goal. This is something that you have always thought about doing, and the thought of hit makes your heart skip a little bit, puts a pit in your stomach, and a lump in your throat. Now when you think about this, remember you want to do something that pushes you past your comfort zone, but is still obtainable.
For me it started with simple 5k’s, then it went to obstacle course 5k’s, then to triathlons. I LOOOOOVE triathlon, but I didn’t start there. When I finally decided that this was my next B-HAG, I felt all the things just described above. This is the person that I am working to get back, too. In the few years after my races, my marriage hit the struggle bus, and I stopped taking my anti-depressants, so I ate all the sadness, struggles, and feelings.
I went from a hour glass figure at a solid 160 pounds to 230 pounds as of January 2019. Since then, I have taken my time in dropping and maintaining my weight loss. I am currently at 210 pounds and working towards being the athlete that I have always been. At the moment my current process is training for more 5k’s next spring and summer, but my B-HAG is to run the sprint Spartan Race https://www.spartan.com/en in September 2020. From there I will do a Trifecta in 2021 (check out the sight). I love triathlon, but training in the pool is killing my scalp and hair, so until we have a freshwater pool somewhere, I am dual athlete instead.
One of the last tips I have for you in this post, is analysis paralysis. This simply means that you are so bombarded with information about losing weight all the things that come along with it, that you fail to act at all. So, if you been online and taken all the sample tests to the Keto Diet, the South Beach Diet, the Mediterranean Diet, and all the other things our there but have yet to make a decision this is for you. Just choose one! If you don’t know what to do or where to go, here are some tools that have helped me.
First be sure to make an appointment with your doctor to get off to a good start! This is also a great way to get a baseline for overall health and fitness, and can be a great way to see your progress with followup appointments.
I have been tracking my calories and macros with the Lose It App. I find this to be user friendly and I like the bright colors https://www.loseit.com . If you are not sure what you should be eating and how much, simply follow the My Plate examples at https://www.choosemyplate.gov. Additionally, I love to strength train, hate creating my workouts. Once I finish with Insanity by Shaun T. and move to wight training in January, I will be using the Habit Nest weight lifting journal https://habitnest.com/collections/fitness-journals/products/the-weightlifting-gym-buddy-journal. This is something that passed my eye on Instagram and I knew this was for me.
Lastly, enlist a friend or partner to help keep you accountable. If that means you meet daily to workout, or you call them when you are feeling a moment of weakness, so the can remind you what you are working towards.
Share Your Story and Your Goals?
I love to learn from others and cheer other people on in their goals and journeys! Comment on the post to share what you have going on in your journey of getting healthy. Let more positive people support you as you do it!
Thank you for spillin it with me,